20 of the all-time best Twitter bios

Dec 9th

Twitter biographies might be the ultimate creative-writing challenge. You have 160 characters to spin your personal story! Here are 20 great mini-biographies that caught my eye and stole my heart. Enjoy!

@QueenRania
A mum and a wife with a really cool day job…

@Glinner
I apologise in advance.

@oilman
Recommended by 4 out of 5 people that recommend things.

@TheMadHat
Reeling and Writhing, of course, to begin with, and then the different branches of arithmetic — Ambition, Distraction, Uglification, and Derision.

@AllisonBatof

Naturally and artificially flavoured

@BittrBetty

Just some chick bitching about her effed up life and stuff…

@maxxhendriks

I was born. When I was 11 I got my first computer. Then I started writing funny tweets. That’s still what I am doing. The end.

@RebeccaWoodcock

I am a sample size of one, not statistically significant, nor representative.

@MadsBloggingMom

Smart ass blogging mom. Its all about me, really.

@KRCraft

An ounce of perception – a pound of obscure.

@janefader

I talk like a baby and I never pay for drinks.

@DianaSilvaSays

I love my husband, my dogs, all things marketing, three-day weekends, high-heels, reading, running, knitting, sushi, wine, long walks on the beach…wait, what?

@RainnWilson

I am an actor and a writer and I co-created SoulPancake and my son, Walter.

@PamelaLund

Spreading smiles like they’re herpes

@CKRapp

My life was changed by a train.

@Tweeetstreet

Nothing more than a man who cared enough to try

@EzraButler

I’m the illegitimate love-child of Strategy and Creativity. Now neither parent admits to having me…

@brant

It only ends once. Anything that happens before that is just progress.

@cshirky
Bald. Unreliable. Easily distracte

@snotforprofit

The only person on Twitter who doesn’t claim to be a social media guru.

Take the Mystery Out of Twitter!

Become a Twitter Ninja in just 90 minutes with the The Tao of Twitter, the best-selling Twitter book in the world! Learn the three elements behind every Twitter success, 22 ways to build a relevant audience, strategies to create personal and business benefits, and hundreds of amazing tips and time-savers.

Click on the image for a Special Amazon promotion!

Previous funny Twitter bio editions:

20 of the world’s wittiest Twitter bios

20 of the all-time most clever Twitter bios

20 of the all-time best Twitter bios (part2!)

20 of the most entertaining Twitter bios

CarpData

co-created my son – too funny!
freelancerant

Nice ones… makes me think it’s time to update my bio!

My all time favorite bio is @[expletive]mydadsays:

“I’m 29. I live with my 74-year-old dad. He is awesome. I just write down [expletive] that he says”

Not a whole lot of tweets but gems when they come
jacobvar

one of my faves Tim Sidell, @badbanana -Sometimes I just want to give it all up and become a handsome billionaire.
MadsBloggingMom

Blushing! And here I thought no one read my stuff! Yeah! And I didn’t even have to pay you off!
Elyse_D

Ha! These are great. Makes my Bio seem boring in comparison, but it does its job.
markwschaefer

@MadsBloggingMom No, you do have to pay me off. You mean you didn’t get the bill? I put you on the installment plan : )
markwschaefer

@jacobvar OK definitely on the next list!
markwschaefer

@Elyse_D They challenge us don’t they? : ) Thanks Elyse!
Pingback: Tweets that mention « 20 of the all-time best Twitter bios »» humor, twitter »» Schaefer Marketing Solutions: We Help Businesses {grow} -- Topsy.com
3HatsComm

Yes, my bio is tres lame in comparison. That description matters. I will follow/follow back someone on Twitter at least in part if they have a clever or at least human, friendly seeming bio. Wish I could remember some good ones .. I like @unsuckit.. “unsucking your douchey jargon.” I know there are plenty of others, will drop back and add them when I can. Now off to check out some of these folks. Thanks.
markwschaefer

@3HatsComm Well mine is lame by comparsion too, but maybe that is my brand image! Ha!
KRCraft

These are brilliantly creative nad funny. I’m smitten. I’m also flattered to have been included. A certain day maker & smile generator. Enjoying the comments, too. I’ll have to check back often to read more as they flow in.

I’m frantically scouring my list, as there is one I’d like to recommend. I know what it says, but I can’t recall whose it is.

Nicely done, Mark! @EzraButler’s is my personal fav. Tickles me to no end.
MikeFraietta

My long-time favorite:

@ev I started this.

He changed it though.
maxxhendriks

Hi Mark, thanks for the mention.. I had never thought twice about my bio. Now I feel self conscious. LOL
markwschaefer

@maxxhendriks That’s probably the beauty of it : )
markwschaefer

@MikeFraietta Classic. Too bad he changed it : )
markwschaefer

@KRCraft I’m sure it will be awhile before i can curate another list this good, so you certainly have the time! Thanks!
la_loquita

thanks for sharing ) great read )))

Now feeling the need to redo my bio… *le sigh*

la_loquita
3HatsComm

@markwschaefer Guess we’re just better at branding for others. But I decided to hide the lameness, or maybe use it to my advantage so behold, my new Twitter bio: “Solo public relations, social media, design pro desperately seeking great wine, dream clients, LSU wins, winning lottery ticket. And of course, world peace.” Whataya think?
AbsoluteBrand

@shavemistress | ShaveMistress by day for ShaveReview.com, semi pro female boxer by night
Marketing_Guy

Cool idea. It does make you reconsider your own bio. It should tie to your personal brand although from some of the descriptions I do not think brand building was top of mind.
Chrisvd

@ifficiency | CEO of i-FFICIENCY, iPad Jedi, Remote lifestyle guru, efficiency wizard, type-a maniac, Tasmanian devil in a button down, pure awesomeness,not Neo, I am iGUY
annhandley

So I forget who has this, but one of my all-time favorites: “Former baby.”
http://www.montrealfinancial.ca/blog ladyjuliafish

@markwschaefer@jacobvar
Love @badbanana ‘s tweets ! (Having a bad hair day. Just found out it stole a car and then shot a cashier at the liquor store.)
@SethMacfarlane ‘s is pretty good: Official Twitter Page of Seth MacFarlane – based on the novel Push by Sapphire
kwatt

@brant’s is from the season five finale of LOST.
markwschaefer

@annhandley Thanks for joining in the fun Ann!
markwschaefer

@Chrisvd Well done. : )
markwschaefer

@la_loquita Oh this made me laugh. Isn’t that from Pepe le Peu? BTW, Did you know that in France, that cartoon character is Italian? : )
thomasbabuj

Mine is , Big Tummy ! Small Brain
markwschaefer

@thomasbabuj Ha! Thanks Thomas!
Pingback: « 20 of the all-time best Twitter bios »» humor, twitter … « bios
http://markharai.com GACConsultants

Yo Mark – these are too funny – honestly, I wouldn’t have followed any of these people/bios! Time to get a sense of humor, geez!!

Cheers to you ; )
jasonfalls

You forgot my personal favorite … with apologies … @nancyfalls
markwschaefer

@GACConsultants Thanks Mark. Glad you enjoyed them!
markwschaefer

@jasonfalls You made me LOOK IT UP??? OK, It was worth it. Definitely makes the second edition : )

I’m @JasonFalls’s wife. I am not on Twitter. Go do something useful.
Sally_G

I really enjoyed this! I have no Bios to contribute unfortunately ~ I tend not to read or notice them. I find they mostly reflect who people THINK they are.

But I’m a sucker for a sense of humour! Thank you Mark …
3HatsComm

@jasonfalls I’m with Mark, making us WORK for it?! Good one.
dmso

@KRCraft’s is from “Vital Signs” by Rush.
dmso

@KRCraft Your bio is from a Rush lyric? I approve.
markwschaefer

@ladyjuliafish Oh too funny
markwschaefer

@dmso @KRCraft The world would be a little better with more RUSH. Just ask @ikepigott
KRCraft

@markwschaefer @dmso @KRCraft
Indeed! All the world’s a stage, and we are merely players…

If you’re a Rush fan, I recommend you read Neil Peart’s books, too. I enjoyed Masked Rider most, which is about his travels by bike through Africa.
dmso

@KRCraft @markwschaefer I have all of Neil’s books. Do you read his blog?
newbizblogger

Here’s one:

@bwoj Husband, father, software engineer, serial entrepreneur, evil genius™, aspiring scruffy-looking nerf-herder, locally optimal genetic solution.

Followed him back just b/c of his “evil genius”…lol – someone who doesn’t take himself so seriously … gotta love it!

These twitter bio’s really makes me want to change mine; interjecting fun is always a great idea.
Pingback: Mi biografía en 140 caracteres ¿cómo hago? | Redes Sociales
batchoichoi

Nice one.. I enjoy this! Thanks for the post and Happy Holidays..

<a href=”http://www.friedlandlawcenter.com/”>Friedland Law Center</a>
http://twitter.com/jmitchem Jim Mitchem

@oilman’s should be ‘who’ recommend things. unless he’s a writer, and it’s ironic. i dunno – I’m picking.
Casudi

I was soooo pleased when I first wrote my 6 word bio, however after these it seems quite boring.
BUILDING BRIDGES BETWEEN PEOPLE ~ DESIGNING SUCCESS
@CASUDI
Pingback: Top 10 Social Media Articles That You Might Have Missed Last Month: December 2010 Edition « Digital Marketing Mercenary
@Christine_Gibbs

Love the laughs. Thx for posting. @christine_gibbs
Sophienorris

I don’t like dogs. So don’t bother following me.
Follow me and you’ll realise why i’m too important to write a bio.
I love music.. and your Dad
http://nittygriddy.com/ Ingrid Abboud

Alright I made it over here – better late than never eh?
I loved @snotforprofit!
I’m familiar with Queen Rania’s since I follow here and in general – she has a good sense of humor.

Cheers Mark
http://YourStressMatters.com Dr. Rae

Cool, very cool Mark!!! “Here’s looking at you, kid.” ; )
Pingback: 20 of the all-time best Twitter bios « 2ndimpression's Blog
Pingback: designed by us
Pingback: Hoe werkt Twitter? | Creatz
Jacob landry

THACHEEZANATOR’s Bio is:

I would love to change the world,but they wouldn’t give me the source code-Some hacker Dude
Pingback: Birth of a Persona: How to Create a Twitter Account for Your Freelance Writing Business | Writing Whale
http://twitter.com/NielZapanta Niel Zapanta

Nice It’s a big help for a dumb like me lol
Hannah Sophie

Mine is .. Lollypop lady, actress, athlete, gardener, spy, doctor, teacher and part-time ninja who likes to think she is funny, is clumsy, unreliable and easily distracte

Better than these even though they cracked me up so much!:D
Pingback: PR News Roundup 9/23/11: 5 PR Blog posts You May Have Missed | Cision Blog
http://expatdoctormom.com/ Expat Doctor Mom

How funny And Queen Rania does rock!
Ben

http://twitter.com/#!/benleoni
Pingback: How To Write A Follow-Worthy Twitter Bio In 4 Easy Steps | Your Social Move
Pingback: Student Life Network Blog » 10 Easy Twitter Tips to Help You Not Suck on Twitter
http://twitter.com/skypulsemedia Howie at Sky Pulse Media

This was a great read for a Sunday morning read Mark!
Jamiie_daviis

Jesus you’re my number one, Daniel Tosh you’re my number two.<3
Pingback: Tip Me: How to Write a Follow-Worthy Twitter Bio | Social Brand Aid
Soccerchicadee3

heey, so I only have 160 characters so I’ll try to make this short. if you like my tweets feel free to retweet. Anything you want to know just #tweetme. Please #follow.

@Sara_Huberfeld
http://www.terrislittlehaven.com/ Terrishaven

Shoot, and I thought mine was creative. @terrishutterbug:twitter
Pingback: 20 Days to a High-Quality, Highly-Engaged Twitter Following (in just 20 minutes a day)
http://twitter.com/TheIsaacBurton Isaac Burton

FOLLOW ME @TheIsaacBurton:twitter FOR FUNNY TRUE TWEETS & EVENTS
http://twitter.com/hendrey hendrey

LOL what *else* would they reflect when we write them ourselves? You have a kind of cutting opinion of other people’s bios, given that you don’t read or notice them. Let’s say you’re right, though. Maybe your auto-bio would say, “clever iconoclast with a keen eye for the truth,” while an onlooker’s bio of you might read, “fun and friendly, w/judgmental streak & low opinion of other ppl’s self-awareness.” Okay, we can do mine. I’ll be “pragmatic geek; loves singing & family; never says no to friends.” But you can call me “snarky nerd w/martyr complex and too much time on hands.”
Pingback: Social Media and Autobiography « lifestorytotell
http://www.iol.co.za/ Adriaan Wepener

some awesome ones..
Pingback: 9 consigli utili per far crescere il proprio profilo Twitter | Viralbeat
Dyana

Follow me @Dya_Setiawan thx!!
Pingback: How to write your Twitter Bio? Dos and Don’ts! | some of my random thoughts…
April

Hahaha! Great post! I love Diana – that’s me!
http://twitter.com/emtz2012 Ernesto Martinez

I thought this one was pretty good:
hey, i just met you… and this is crazy.. but here’s my Twitter, so FOLLOW baby.
http://stressfreewebtraffic.com/ Cathy Presland

Very funny – i know mine is boring – now i know i need to do something about it!
Pingback: Hiking the Blogosphere: From Island-Building to The 20 All-Time Funniest Twitter Bios « Elaine Smothers
Jarreedd22

lol i saw this one @Gwall22 Strictly school smart, loses everything, climbing till I hit the top!
http://twitter.com/CrazYLuNatiCkMe Hussein Abdultayeb

Loved this: “I’m real. Just me! …Standing in front of the world, asking you to follow me”
Kee?

Follow me on twitter @_Iamtaylor_d show some love pleasee! & @Brant was the best to me
Taylor

Let me know if you think mine is good. You can check it out at @_TaylorScott_ ..or read it here:”I could tell you about myself, but then myself would have to kill me.”
mike

This guy has books now because of his twitter!
Pingback: How to Create an Engaging Twitter Bio – 5 Examples that Get Results | Socially Sorted
Pingback: 50 Ways To Reach Your Reader # : Twitter For Indie Authors | Advice on Self-Publishing & Selling Your Books. From The Alliance of Independent Authors
LOL

i like that bio
Pingback: 20 of the all-time best Twitter bios | Social Media Bits and Bobs | Scoop.it
Pingback: How Interesting Is Your Social Media Bio? « Phil Cooke
Pingback: The Keys to a Better Social Media Bio « Phil Cooke
Pingback: Daily Post: Ghostwriter | tel-uh-vizh-uh-ner-ee
Pingback: Twitter Bios as Personal Ads – Speed Dating for the Social Networker | Jasmin Kirkbride

Subscribe to {Grow}

Enter your Email

Welcome to {grow}

You’re in marketing for one reason: Grow. Grow your company, reputation, customers, impact, profits. Grow yourself. This is a community that will help. It will stretch your mind, connect you to fascinating people, and provide some fun along the way. I am so glad you’re here. -Mark Schaefer
Follow Mark
Book Mark to Speak!
Groups We Believe In
Search
Categories
The Archives
- 2013 (110)
  - May (19)
  - April (21)
  - March (24)
  - February (21)
  - January (25)
- 2012 (281)
  - December (20)
  - November (22)
  - October (23)
  - September (22)
  - August (25)
  - July (24)
  - June (25)
  - May (25)
  - April (21)
  - March (25)
  - February (23)
  - January (26)
- 2011 (274)
  - December (24)
  - November (22)
  - October (20)
  - September (25)
  - August (25)
  - July (21)
  - June (27)
  - May (27)
  - April (20)
  - March (23)
  - February (24)
  - January (16)
- 2010 (222)
  - December (18)
  - November (17)
  - October (19)
  - September (19)
  - August (17)
  - July (17)
  - June (15)
  - May (18)
  - April (19)
  - March (21)
  - February (24)
  - January (18)
- 2009 (190)
  - December (21)
  - November (17)
  - October (22)
  - September (21)
  - August (27)
  - July (30)
  - June (15)
  - May (26)
  - April (11)

20 of the all-time best Twitter bios

Take the Mystery Out of Twitter!

Subscribe to {Grow}

Welcome to {grow}

Follow Mark

Book Mark to Speak!

Groups We Believe In

Search

Categories

The Archives