Posts tagged interesting twitter bios
20 of the World’s Wittiest Twitter Bios
Jan 25th
I know you LOVE these funny Twitter bios. Yes, they’re real and they’re fabulous. Here we go!
@organising
Let me bitch at you every day until you sort your shit out.
@Newtoblogging
Maybe I should rethink this, when I spelled it Blooging at first.
@danecook
When I tweet, I tweet to kill.
@maurastl
Pour yourself a drink, put on some lipstick, and pull yourself together.
@SALJmum
Making the Snuggie look good since 2009.
@fiona_mca
Trying to elevate small talk to medium talk.
@ankurtz
Currently starring in my own reality show titled, A Modern Cinderella; One Girl’s Search for Love and Shoes.
@Maya_Abeille
Generally, the path of least resistance appeals. Also, I am superb at parallel parking.
@DudeGurlz
I’m Kail, I was given a girl’s name when I was a baby because my parents are idiots.
@webbrd
Former military guy & cop. Leprechauns freak me out.
@mdvaldosta
Where the hell am I, and how did I get here?
@bargold
Born at a very young age.
@andrealown
Good Samaritan, washed-up athlete, especially gifted napper.
@gabrielfoley
another papercut survivor
@phampants
Absolutely awkward, proud nerd & geek, decreaser of world suck
@carlosbenevides
Lover of pork, runner (’cause of all the pork)
@jasondill
99% of the time my brain is thinking blah, meh, why, huh, WTF, food and computers. The other 1% i’m usually asleep.
@grbinder (Greg)
Trying to change the name from Tweeting to Gregging
@marcmack
Marc is a man with a dream. A very simple dream, mostly involving nachos and beer, but a dream nonetheless.
@oldfox004
Winner of World’s Best Wife Award (Category: Nagging)
@pathfinderpat
I’m going to reveal the two secrets of my success: One) Don’t reveal everything.
- Transforming unconscious survival patterns into strategic (authentic) leadership by harmonizing your thinking (IQ), feelings (EQ), communication and actions.
- Life’s so Fun-tastic. Just Be Alive!!!
- Good morning. I behave decently to everyone without any expectation of rewards or punishment after I’m dead.
- Decoding the million wonderful and inspiring stories within the quirky world of accounting.
- I’m fabulous. I’m an incredible dresser, I’ve got buckets of money, I’m a hoot and a half and I got a killer rack.
Take the Mystery Out of Twitter!
Previous funny Twitter bio editions:
20 of the world’s most clever Twitter bios
20 of the all-time funniest Twitter bios (part 2!)
20 of the world’s most clever Twitter bios
Sep 21st
Last year I started “collecting” great Twitter bios and kind of got hooked. When I decided to publish “The All-Time Best Twitter bios,” and “The 20 Funniest Twitter Bios,” readers of {grow} seemed to get hooked too! So here we are with the third edition. These are all real Twitter bios …
@MichaelACaruso
I’ve learned I don’t know anything. Have also learned that people will pay for what I know. Life is good.
@ProbablyBaking
Living one day at a time, with a fresh baked cookie. Okay. And with a coffee. And maybe some chocolate. But I promise to take my vitamins.
@janefcox
Insert pretentious crap about myself here.
@Mobium
Buddy, can you paradigm?
@Laura_the_Wise
Nerdfighter. Determined dreamer. Has ambitions to be crazy cat lady if marrying various celebrity crushes proves impossible.
@Anpehuis
(Note this is Finlandish. I don’t know what it says, but get a load of all those letters! I figure any bio with the word Oyj in it has got to be great.)
@_PenelopeNYC
Coffee-Drinker, eReader Addict, Mom, Blogger. I’m very busy and important
@BrandBySarah
90% of your problems can be solved by marketing. Solving the other 10% just requires good procrastination skills.
@hmcdani2
I’m really a giant cupcake. Afraid of roller coasters and dry ice
@AnonEmus216
I used to love my old twitter account, then everyone from work found me. This is my new account
@glynette
I have been called a PollyAnna, sugar-coated idealist. I like to think of myself as more optimistic than that
@TylerLClark
I’m not smart. I just wear glasses.
@billyblogs
I’m real and I hope some of my followers are too
@ThatGuySteve08
HOLY CRAP I’M GOING TO BE A DAD! Oh yea, I work in email marketing & I like craft beer too.
@jfloyd
I’m just a boy, standing in front of the world, asking you to follow me.
@iMadiD
do not judge me before u know me, but just to inform u, you won’t like me
@karenrclark
I’ve never been a millionaire but I just know I’d be darling at it
@stndotsidurself
A human. Being.
@Rhymetime24
Why talk when you can mock? Why hide your Face like I got Mace? Is it all an act or just a Fact. Maybe if you didn’t drool, you’d be cool. Ran out of room boom
@kamazonia
I’m a Basset Hound aficionado with a mouth like a Syphilitic sailor.
BONUS CONTENT!!
As I scoured the Twitterverse for the most clever bios, I also found some pretty bad ones, too! But they are also funny in their own strange way. I don’t want to embarass anyone so I’ve removed the handles, but I couldn’t resist some of these clunkers:
- Fascinated by transactional nature of counterknowledge & public discourse in socially mediated spaces which simulate (but don’t engender) counter-public spheres
- follow me
- I’m indifferent to most items on the planet. Some people call me a Social Media Guru. I don’t correct them.
- I have a dream to gain the freedom to help people Through new products, helping then grow through experiences and achieving their dreams and their freedom
- Job Opportunity Promoter, I follow back for FREE!!!
- hello my sexy armadillo. I’ll follow back esp if youre irish
Well, as a matter of fact, madam … I am. : )
Take the Mystery Out of Twitter!
, the best-selling Twitter book in the world! Learn the three elements behind every Twitter success, 22 ways to build a relevant audience, strategies to create personal and business benefits, and hundreds of amazing tips and time-savers.20 of the world’s wittiest Twitter bios
20 of the all-time funniest Twitter bios (part 2!)
20 of the all-time best Twitter bios
Dec 9th
Twitter biographies might be the ultimate creative-writing challenge. You have 160 characters to spin your personal story! Here are 20 great mini-biographies that caught my eye and stole my heart. Enjoy!
@QueenRania
A mum and a wife with a really cool day job…
@Glinner
I apologise in advance.
@oilman
Recommended by 4 out of 5 people that recommend things.
@TheMadHat
Reeling and Writhing, of course, to begin with, and then the different branches of arithmetic — Ambition, Distraction, Uglification, and Derision.
@AllisonBatof
Naturally and artificially flavoured
@BittrBetty
Just some chick bitching about her effed up life and stuff…
@maxxhendriks
I was born. When I was 11 I got my first computer. Then I started writing funny tweets. That’s still what I am doing. The end.
@RebeccaWoodcock
I am a sample size of one, not statistically significant, nor representative.
@MadsBloggingMom
Smart ass blogging mom. Its all about me, really.
@KRCraft
An ounce of perception – a pound of obscure.
@janefader
I talk like a baby and I never pay for drinks.
@DianaSilvaSays
I love my husband, my dogs, all things marketing, three-day weekends, high-heels, reading, running, knitting, sushi, wine, long walks on the beach…wait, what?
@RainnWilson
I am an actor and a writer and I co-created SoulPancake and my son, Walter.
@PamelaLund
Spreading smiles like they’re herpes
@CKRapp
My life was changed by a train.
@Tweeetstreet
Nothing more than a man who cared enough to try
@EzraButler
I’m the illegitimate love-child of Strategy and Creativity. Now neither parent admits to having me…
@brant
It only ends once. Anything that happens before that is just progress.
@cshirky
Bald. Unreliable. Easily distracte
@snotforprofit
The only person on Twitter who doesn’t claim to be a social media guru.
Take the Mystery Out of Twitter!
, the best-selling Twitter book in the world! Learn the three elements behind every Twitter success, 22 ways to build a relevant audience, strategies to create personal and business benefits, and hundreds of amazing tips and time-savers.Click on the image for a Special Amazon promotion!
Previous funny Twitter bio editions:
20 of the world’s wittiest Twitter bios
20 of the all-time most clever Twitter bios
Welcome to {grow}
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Grow your company, reputation, customers, impact, profits. Grow yourself. This is a community that will help. It will stretch your mind, connect you to fascinating people, and provide some fun along the way. I am so glad you’re here.
-Mark SchaeferFollow Mark
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